June 6, 2001

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Kids Will Be Kids

Why is it that kids with prominent parents always have to be in trouble?

I mean pholks, don't you remember the preacher's daughter or son were always the ones the rest of us always called "wild" in high school. Or if the principal of the school or the district superintendent had school age children they could always be counted on to buy the beer, cigarettes or have a stash of cherry bombs or other illegal fireworks year round.

And it seemed like the daughters of the most prominent members in the community were the ones who got knocked up and "had to go away for a while."

If your father was mayor or a councilman or your mom president of the PTA or "mothers club," or whatever, it was a safe bet you were "where the action was."

Sure pholks, there were kids from "prominent families" toeing the line and being "Miss goodie-two-shoes" or "Mr. straight arrow" but generally they were the exceptions.

I came from a respected but by no-means rich family in a very small community. I was the kind of guy mothers trusted with their daughters and all that. I must confess that I was either too dumb or too stupid to take a lot of advantage of that situation. There were, however, times when it payed off, but certainly not as much if I could go back and have another shot at the whole thing.

Anyway, this subject came to mind with all the hubbub about our President's daughters getting caught drinking and/or trying to buy alcohol.

I really don't know how to put this issue (or non-issue) in perspective. Two schools of thought have occupied my middle-age mind for the last week to 10 days.

First, it is easy to say "well, kids will be kids and isn't it refreshing to see that these young women are just like everyone else. They're just doing what most teenagers that age do. How nice."

The other thought goes something like: "My God, these girl's are the President's daughters. What's wrong with them? Where is the Secret Service when these things are going on? How could these girls do that to their parents especially when their dad is President of the Whole United States and he had his problems with alcohol."

First of all we must realize that no matter how much they might want to be "just like regular young adults," they never again will be. They have been "special" since birth with their grandpa being a Texas governor and head of the CIA and one of the most recognized public figures in the nation. And their own father was rich and famous, owned a Major League baseball team, was the Governor of Texas and now the President of the Whole United States of America. Grandma and mom are both first ladies, first in Texas and then the Whole United States of America.

To the issue of them "just doing what most teenagers their age do" I have a little bit of pity for those gals. Sure it's tough on them. Heck, it was tough on me and lots of my generation. We had our fun and got away with a lot of stuff which would have embarrassed our families if they found out–more than they did. But I never had my name splashed across the state, the nation or around the Whole World. Neither myself or friends made the tabloids, the Larry King Show, the Tonight Show or Late Night with David Whatshisname.

I will admit that a college party which I was instrumental in helping arrange made headlines about 35 years ago, but my name didn't appear. There were no deaths involved and only two or three policemen received medical attention and only about a have dozen college students were arrested.

But I wasn't the son of the President, the Governor, the Mayor, Council Member or even the Pope (which would have made me famous no matter what).

But my little bitty pity for these young ladies is strained by fact that with their experience, they should know better.

But the more I think about this, the more clear the answer becomes. These poor girls never had a chance, nor will they ever. Discipline most surely was sparse in their upbringing. Dad was either too drunk or stoned to take charge and mom had her hands full being the good wife, mother and First Lady in Texas then the Whole United States. And Grandpa and Grandma lived in the White House and all. Spankings were out of the question. Think of the headlines if it were discovered that the President's granddaughters had their butts blistered.

Which all adds up to the fact that it's a good thing I never made President or had any children of my own. It would have been a tough deal all around.