The Christmas Season

Twas two weeks or so before Christmas so a few things need to be said before the end of the holiday season.

First, since it has been a tradition that I moan and complain about holiday television ads for salad shooters, Super Clappers and Chia Heads and Chia Pets, I must mention them. Perhaps my message is getting though and those ad guys are paying attention to me. But more likely the fact that nearly everyone has been the recipient of one, two or all three of those "no imagination whatsoever" gifts has killed the market for them. Maybe companies have gotten smart enough to stop wasting millions of ad dollars promoting them every three minutes on television.

Whatever the reason those annoying ads have been scarce so far this season. So far I'm enjoying the lull but I fear somewhere around five days before Christmas there will be a bombardment of those ads more intense than any attack we have launched on Osama Bin Laden so far.

One other possible reason we in the great United States of America have been spared the onslaught of salad shooter, clapper, Chia ads is that the CIA and the Pentagon are stockpiling them in case Bin Laden and his cohorts are captured alive. The ultimate torture. Gruel and unusual punishment but for a good cause. Seventy-two straight hours of those ads would be make a "daisy cutter" bomb attack a welcome event.

Next on my year end agenda is setting the record straight about calendars for the new year.

Last column I sang the praises of the neat calendars being handed out by Farmers Tractor and Equipment Co. of Porterville. The calendar with all that information, helpful hints, charts, graphs, recipes, etc.

Only problem is that I made a typo in Bill the Tractor Seller Guys name. I put a v where an L should have been in his last name which correctly is spelled Kalar. I caught the error myself but not in time.

My excuse that during the morning "coffee club" briefing when the guys were b-essing someone told me to get the L out of there, I mistakenly thought they were talking about the L in Bill's last name. Nobody bought that excuse but I do stand corrected.

Speaking of calendars, do yourself a favor and grab one of Visalia Community Bank's 2002 editions depicting Visalia's heritage. For the third year the bank, with a lot of help for the area's history buffs, has put together a collection of old photographs of Visalia and surrounding area.

I especially like the photo for January which depicts the telephone switchboard in a building located at the corner of Church and Acequia Streets where Mid Town News is located today.

It made me think how nice it would be if we could combine the old days with today's technology. Just think how cool it would be to have some switchboard operators monitoring cell phones. If the call wasn't really necessary some duty-bound operator would pull the plug.

And finally another note on pulling--the pulling together of the people of this great nation. Earlier this month Fresno-Clovis businessman Dave McDonald, the leader of Pelco who flew 1,150 New York firemen and policemen to the Central Valley for a great party and dedication to the heros and the victims of the Sept. 11 disaster.

Prior to the Saturday afternoon extravaganza one of the New York firemen was granted his wish to ride in an California Highway Patrol helicopter. He was flown from Fresno to Woodlake Airport where the CHP guys drop in once in a while for breakfast. The Lieutenant passed on a breakfast because he was not sure how his stomach would react to his first copter ride but he was curious about when he heard about the biscuits and gravy. The New Yorker said he had never heard of or seen a biscuit which is not an East Coast thing. He braved a buttered biscuit which probably will be part of his story he will tell family and friends when talking about his California experience.

Some times it's just the little things that can help make a great nation a little more united. May we all continue to work on that goal in this upcoming new year.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good, good, good new twelve months.

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The above stories are the property of The Valley Voice Newspaper and may not be reprinted without explicit permission in writing from the publisher.