To Segway or Not to Segway?

Used to be you discover something like electricity, the telephone or the Weed Eater and be a worldwide hero and maybe even get rich.

But that was before the gluttony of lawyers, advocates, protests, support or legal defense funds, and foundations for the betterment of or the abolition of whatever.

A prime example of just how screwed up is today's society is the battle which already is starting to be waged over the much touted Segway human transporter which isn't even on the market yet. This is the thing which shrouded in secrecy and referred to as "it" for nearly a year was finally unveiled to the anticipating public.

In case you were under a rock or otherwise out of contact with "what's up" in today's world this invention has been hailed as potentially ranking up there among the wheel, fire, and sliced bread.

The contraption basically is a self-balancing, two-wheeled motorized platform with handlebars, an electric motor, 10 computers and five gyroscopes with a top speed of 12.5 miles per hour. The rider stands on the platform leans forward and the thing quietly moves forward. There are no brakes and no "gas" pedal and if the rider topples off the device it stops automatically.

The cost is expected to start at about $3,000 when the Segway is supposed to go on sale to the public.

So pholks, what's all the fuss about? Well, the lawyers for every group imaginable are circling in a feeding frenzy and there even is a Washington, D.C., law firm, USA Immigration Law Center which has announced it is gearing up to specialize in Segway injury cases, according to a L.A. Times story. The firm's web site calls the transporter a legal nightmare which will be the basis for many lawsuits. Sure, a nightmare of billable hours and big, big bucks.

And you can bet that a good chunk of the $100 million Segway has spent in creating and developing the transporter has been in legal work...lots of billable hours. And there will be tons more before this thing hits the street, or in this case, the sidewalk.

While Segway-chasing-lawyers are waiting in the wings to do their thing, other attorneys are racking up hours getting legislation passed to allow the transporters to be used on the sidewalks. In California and most other states only wheelchairs and carts used by the disabled are legally allowed to roam sidewalks. Segway officials claim the transport is neither a scooter or an electric cart are which are not allowed to use sidewalks. About 30 states already adopted legislation sponsored by Segway supporters to make the transport "sidewalk legal."

The California's State Senate has passed a bill and the Assembly approval reportedly is just around the corner.

But pholks, things just aren't that simple. A pedestrian advocacy group, something called L.A. Walks, is crying that the Seqway could be a killer of pedestrians since it can travel several times faster than the average walker. The legislation, Senate Bill 1918, allows the Seqway to traverse sidewalks without the transportee (my term for the rider) having to have a license or a helmet. however, the bill provides for cities to limit time and places where transporters can be used. Can you imagine the city council meetings on this one?

Of course, there are others who are yelling that the blind will be endangered because the transporter is almost silent. We can expect other group and individuals to rally against the transporter but more than likely the contraption will be commonplace on a sidewalk near you within a couple years. Segway officials righteously have been quoted as stating that the rider ultimately is responsible for whatever it is he or she is riding, be it a skateboard, a bike, a scooter, a wheelchair, tricycle, or roller blades.

Personally, I think this device will be a great thing. I would rank it in the top 25 inventions or discoveries of all time. I still am working on finalizing that list which I hope to publish in the next year or so. But pholks, that's another story for another time.

But my enthusiasm is weakened just a tad by the possibility of what is likely to come. I foresee battles between bands of rouge skate boarders wanting to rumble with Segwayers. Or, what about a cottage industry being built on souping up Segways for racing. Maybe even a professional Segway Winston Cup Series. Will Segwayers unite like Harley owners (HOG–Harley Owners Group) and buy special jackets, boots, helmets, chaps, and all that? Will Segwayers get special tattoos?

Ben Franklin would be shocked if he had to go through what inventors do today.

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