February 2, 2005
Survivor
Still only one golf shoe pholks, but I'm a survivor.
In case you missed the last column, can't remember that far back or really don't give a care, here is the situation: Somewhere between a golfing buddy's home in Visalia and Lemoore Golf Course I lost a golf shoe. It was ( is?) one of a pair of no-laced golf shoes which my loving wife special ordered for my birthday last June. I either dropped it during a transfer from one pickup truck to another or it fell or flew out of one of the vehicles.
Ironically, I played in my normal ribbed-soled shoes and played one of my better games. However, the couple of games since then have not been too hot. l actually can't prove that my lack of real golf foot attire made any difference but it is the best excuse I currently have going. And since my birthday is more than five months away and I doubt my wife will press her Internet shopping luck on such a careless golfer husband, I'm stuck with basically two options: continue to play with my everyday shoes or find a good deal on regular lace-up golf shoes.
Those who care might remember that I vowed to try to find a one-legged (good left leg) golfer with a size 8 to 8 1/2 golf shoe who would agree to a deal. I have given up that hunt due to the extremely long odds, thus leaving me with the two afore mentioned options.
With this issue recapped I move on to what promises to be another family anecdote, this one involving my son-in-law Dan Armstrong. Ironically again, this incident unfolded about the same time as the shoe caper.
No shoes involved in this one but a small dog, a locked vehicle with engine running and a happy ending are involved. Although Dan's telling of the story is a little more drawn out, here is the short version of what happened:
Dan was driving his wife Laura's mini-van doing an errand or two for her when he decided to go by the rural home of one of his property maintenance client's which features a security gate.
The family pet, a small beagle named Mia, was riding along. Dan jumped out of the vehicle to punch in the security gate code returned to the vehicle only to discover the doors were locked apparently due to Mia's enthusiastic jumping near the drivers door lock panel. Dan used his cell phone to call Laura who was sleeping in on the weekend, a very rare occasion for her. Calling the Auto Club and dealing with the logistics needed to resolve the issue took a little time. Meanwhile Dan drew the attention of another person in the area and went to the vehicle to demonstrate his locked-out-of-vehicle- with the engine running situation. But what to his wondering eyes should appear but a raised door lock knob––and a yapping, jumping Mia.
The Auto Club call was canceled and Dan and Mia drove home.
Dan's story will become a part of family history. Mia isn't talking––yet.
THE STORY OF THIS YEAR'S Super Bowl will unfold this Sunday and from all indications it will be a good one. I predict that the team with the best defensive performance will win. It might be decided on a field goal again.
I really don't have a strong favorite and will be pleased to see a close game. I'm excited about the new special Super Bowl commercials but lots of pholks will be anticipating the half-time performance.
I'm not betting on the game but I would surely take the odds against a repeat of the infamous "wardrobe malfunction" at last year's gridiron extravaganza. Unless I'm utterly wrong, this year's Super Bowl half-time will be a bust. But any sanctions, fines or firings are about as likely as finding a left no-laced black size 8 to 8 1/2 golf shoe.
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