October 5, 2005
FALL
Fall. What leafs do and too many golf putts don't, has arrived. I think.
Yep pholks, it's time for my annual ode to autumn. Yes the calendar says it's autumn and I never argue with the calendar. But I'm not ready for fall. Sure I love football and the Big League playoffs and the World Series. My beloved Dodgers didn't make the playoffs but I'll still watch. At least I won't have to put up with Barry Bonds since the Giants didn't make it either. Barry apparently figured he cleaned his system of steroids in case he might be tested after his almost season-long "recuperation for "injuries".
Anyway, fall is here whether I'm ready for it or not.
I really do like fall despite the end of Daylight Savings Time (the worst day of the year when the time changes) but I think we should take a vote each year to determine what day fall (autumn) starts. I do subscribe to the adage that "fall is in the air" and really can tell the difference when the season arrives.
I like the fall feeling. But I want it on my terms. Really I'm not a selfish person. I love to share and take good pride in my efforts to do just that..So why can't we all share something special, like fall. Lets just have autumn "fall"at a little more convenient time. Anyway, I think we should mount a drive to get "Fall Arrival" on the ballot. Perhaps our governor will go along with my idea. He really likes to put things on the ballot and even call for special elections. I don't know if electing the day for fall to begin merits a special election, but these days my chances of getting that to happen probably are not that remote. Remember, this is California.
Just think pholks how much fun it would be to campaign for the first day of fall. Of course we would have to put a dozen or so dates on the ballot. Voters could vote for three days. First choice vote is worth three points, second two and third one. The date getting the biggest total would be the winner-the official starting date of the "New Fall."
Don't get me wrong, pholks, I'm not trying to mess with Mother Nature." No sir, I know better. That Mother is tough enough I just would like to charm her a little and make a few adjustments. Make her fall a little more pleasant and convenient. Make fall a more friendly season. Almost anything can be improved.
If there has to be a compromise, I would add a few days to Spring, but too much messing with Mother Nature is pushing things a bit too far, I suppose.
An alternate plan would be to return a couple things to Fall which have been missing in recent years. Keep Fall on the calendar as it is, but return the burning of leaves in the yards of our homes. I know all about the air pollution and all that but the smell of burning leafs is the essence of fall. Just two days a month–preferably on the weekends would mean a lot to a lot of pholks. Those of us old enough to remember when the raking and burning of yard leaves was something special can never forget that. I'm a okay with some restrictions if they are for the public good and all that. But a couple of days or even hours a month would not hurt anyone. With some warning, those who can't handle the smoke and smell could take precautions. Maybe they could wear masks and still enjoy the sight of the ritual of burning leaves. The aroma of fall might even be an after-shave or casual perfume fragrance. "Ode To Autumn" I would call it.
Perhaps we could have a designated leaf burning area. Like a block partly or a special event in a park.
Pholks could bring their bags of leaves and make the event a big social event.a hot-dog roast, a few marshmallows or a good old ice cream social. Guys could throw the football around. The older guys could show the younger ones how to throw a spiral and have the kids "go long." Nothing too extreme. Maybe a hay ride ln the evening.
My point is pholks, I think Fall is nice. I just want it to be better. I also want my golf putts to fall.
I realize I can't have everything I want, but it is healthy to have dreams. If we have to fall back, let's make it a little more fun. 1.
Miles can be reached at mshuper@valleyvoicenewspaper.com
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