Melissa

I don't get much e-mail, pholks.

Hardly ever at home and generally less than a dozen per week at the office. And rarely do I get personal e-mail. I'm not an E-mail kind of guy, I guess.

So when "Melissa" sent me an electronic message with the first two words "Dearly Beloved.." tag line, I took notice. I know at least two women, a family member and a friend with that name, so I was expecting good news. The thought that a secret admirer was "coming out" also crossed my mind. Years ago that did happen, but that's another story.

Well this e-mail was good news, but not from either Melissa we know. This Melissa, last name "Pointer," had chosen me to handle a lot of money as I see fit. Pholks, ‘ol Miles Around may not be around a lot longer if things work out as dear Melissa outlines in her heart-string plucking e-mail to yours truly.

That's because Melissa wants me to manage $3.5 million her late husband left her. The bank is in Europe, nothing more specific at this time.

Seems like Melissa has been notified the money is hers if she, as the beneficiary, comes forward to sign for it or has some one authorized by her to sign for it. But poor Melissa can't do that because she's in a hospital in Kenya undergoing treatment for esophageal cancer.

Poor Melissa has even more problems. She has lost her ability to talk and her doctors have told her she has only a few weeks to live.

My heart got even heavier when I read "It is my last wish to see this money distributed to charity organizations any where in the World."

Add to this the fact that "Because relatives and friends have plundered so much of my wealth since my illness... I can not live with the agony of entrusting this huge responsibility to any of them."

She tells me this after explaining that she is the widow of Harry Pointer, who worked for Chevron/Texaco in Kenya for 20 years before dying in 2001, after 10 years of childless marriage. Poor ‘ol Harry died after a brief (4-day) illness.

Seems like Harry and Melissa were born again Christians and Melissa tells me that she decided "not to re-marry or get a child outside my matrimonial home which the Bible is against.'

But pholks, I think it was her pleading for help which got to me.

"I beg you in the name of God to help me stand and collect the funds from the bank. I want a person that is God fearing to help use this money to fund churches, orphanages and widows propagating the word of God to ensure that this house of God is maintained."

And as Melissa so poignantly phrases it, "The Bible made us to understand that blessed is the hand that giveth. I took this decision because I don't want a situation where this money will be used in an ungodly manner."

Melissa is not afraid of death, she vows, because she knows where she is going–to the bosom of the Lord.

So that explains why "I don't need any telephone communication in this regard because of my soundless voice and the presence of my husband's relations around me always. I don't want them to know about this development."

Since all things are possible with God, Melissa writes "as soon as I receive your reply I shall give you the contact of the attorney who is in Europe as he will be the one to assist you in laying claims for this (sic) flunds."

Well pholks, I'm a God fearing man and I know I can find many ways to put that much money to good use.

I don't know how Melissa found out what a great guy Miles Around is and that he would not spend too much of that money frivously. I guess word has been getting out that I'm really a swell guy and working toward getting even "sweller."

Of course there would be a lot of expenses and a good-deed doer has to travel, eat and dress in style–along with his wife.

Pholks, I consider it my responsibility to Melissa, God bless her–to carry out her wishes. I know her attorney–the one in Europe where that banks is–,will want me to show my good faith by fronting some good-faith money–but I'm already making plans to help this dying, non-speaking woman.

It's the least I can do.

If you would like to help me help dear Melissa be able to rest in peace, please get in touch with me—real soon.