The Value of Friendship

Millions of words have been written and spoken about the true value of friendship.

Sure pholks, everybody says that friends are special. They're a special treasure and the very best of them increase in value with age. I have always cherished my friendships. Many of them dating back to my childhood, teenage years, young adulthood and to the present. Of course we all hear the tern I married my best friend, but pholks I think, in my case there's no doubt about it. Only problem is it would have been nice if it had happened twenty or thirty years earlier.

As far as I'm concerned, having and keeping friends is better than winning the lottery.

I didn't win the Lottery last week, again, but I had an opportunity to renew an old friendship that dates back to the early 1970s.

I was able to have lunch with a woman we'll call Bev, who still lives in the area and works just a few blocks from my office. Although I see her father several times a year, I had not seen Bev or talked with her for at least 30 years, to the best of our recollection. Bev was a lady with whom I had socially dated for a year or two. No exclusive dating, no romance, no old flame, just good friends who made the social scene in Visalia in those days. I was a reporter and she worked in local government. Our paths crossed several times a week at least. We went to movies, work related-dinner dances, once-a-month Sunday dinners at her parents home and sometimes a drink or two after work. Good dating buddies. Friends.

About six months ago when I talked with her parents, I inquired about her whereabouts. Although I knew she had married many years ago and knew her last name, I didn't know if she still worked or was even in the area. Her dad, a loyal reader of Miles Around, told me where she worked and suggested we make contact. I gave him my number and several weeks later Bev called me at work. It was a pleasant surprise and the voice was easily recognizable. For a half hour we chatted, talked about family, spouses, work, old times and old friends. She suggested that after the holidays we get together for lunch.

I told my wife Kathy about my surprise call and suggested we all get together for lunch, schedules permitting. Last week it was time for the "reunion," and we picked a restaurant where we'd be able to talk without too much surrounding chatter.

I got there first since Bev said she might be a little late getting away from her office, but not to worry since she had rest of the day off for our lunch "date" and to do some errands. I waited for nearly a half hour, wondering whether we'd recognize each other and at the same time remembering that Beverly had often been late for our social engagements back in the early 1970s.

But I could not help but wonder, Pholks, whether I was suffering a senior moment and had picked the wrong location or the wrong time. Eventually Bev entered the restaurant, looked around and for a brief second we both exchanged wondering glances. After a brief warm greeting we got down to lunch and the real business of the afternoon - recalling old times.

It's tough pholks trying to catch up on 30 plus years in 90 minutes or so. We talked about friends, trying to recall names and realized how many people we knew through work and social activities had died.

Here we were two senior citizens that still worked in the same city, in the same downtown area, whose paths may have unknowingly been crossed more than once.

It was amazing pholks the details we did remember. Bev chuckled when recalling a movie "date" in which she had invited her mother. She said she had often worried if I'd been bothered by her invitation. It was my turn to grin and chuckle a little. I vividly and occasionally recall the Steve McQueen movie "Bullet" with the classic car chase through the streets of San Francisco. I had seen the movie several days before and it was the talk of the town. I told Bev I recalled her and mom wide-eyed and tense and Bev squeezing my hand with a near death grip during that chase, one of my all-time favorite movie scenes...a great memory for friends to share.

Well pholks, there we were, each of us a happily married senior citizens sharing memories of the good old days, memories of those we each worked with. Mutual friends, funny little stories about our lives.

Anyway, the lunch was good, seeing a long-time friend after a 30-year recess was great. We agreed we need to stay in touch and not wait so long. And this time my 'best friend'' (my wife) can help provide an update on "whatever happened" to Bev's old "dating buddy."