Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to us - all of us in the wonderful U.S.

I hope all you pholks take time to contemplate for true importance of July 4 this weekend in whichever way you mark the 234th birth of our great nation.

July is a great month in many ways and Independence Day certainly has been one of my favorite holidays. Even with the normal heat here in the Valley in July, the celebration of July Fourth gives us something to anticipate. Good friends, fireworks, parties, barbecues, the river, the pool, the beach, the mountains, the special events all make for fun times.

Be safe and sane and use common sense and everything should be okay.

But now pholks, I've gotta tell you something I just found out about July - something which very likely none of you know about. If you do know, you're at least one up on me, but that's okay. Did you know that July is National Cell Phone Courtesy Month?

There is not a day, week or month which is not observed, honored, proclaimed or in some manner designed for something. That is a fact.

I guess there is nothing wrong with that, but pholks I just think this freedom to do whatever we want, within the law of course, gets a little out of control. What is especially troubling is the lack of common sense which should go along with some of these so-called observances. Hotdog makers want us to think about hotdogs at a certain time.

Charities are great at getting us to focus on what they are working for. That's fine. Getting people to promote a specific cause is commendable.

Things like “wear pink slippers and dye your hair green Tuesdays” are plain silly but there always will be those who feel they have to do that.

But this cell phone courtesy month thing is asinine. It's stupid and lacks common sense.

Misuse and overuse of cell phones have been peeves of mine for years and years. I'm peeved in January through December. Monday through Sunday, rain and shine. Age and becoming mellower have tempered my reaction to inappropriate and stupid cell phone use but I never will be satisfied until common sense floods the universe. Like that's going to happen.

Draining the oceans with a tea cup or cleansing the gulf of oil will happen much sooner, I'm afraid.

Designating a certain month to use cell phones correctly and politely is like following the Ten Commandments on a month to month basis.

“Thou shall not kill in May” or “Thou shall not covert your neighbor's wife in October” is not how it is done. That would make it all right to kill anyone in July, November or whatever, except in May or to steal in any month but June.

July Fourth is symbolic of our freedoms. It is not symbolic of freedom to be stupid, self-important, dumb, asinine, rude, insensitive, careless or arrogant.

Someone named Jacqueline Whitmore is supposed to be one of the nation's foremost experts on etiquette and protocol. She offered several steps for wireless phone users who want to avoid offending others.

Here are some of her suggestions:

Be all there.

“When you are in a meeting, performance, courtroom or other busy place, let calls go to voicemail to avoid a disruption. In some instances, turning you phone off may be the best solution.”

Way to go, Jackie, baby. Hope you didn't spend more than three days figuring that one out. Tell them that texting in front of and around others is rude. Emergency situations are okay, but pholks, those are rare.

Keep it Private.

“Be aware of your surroundings and avoid discussing private or confidential information in public. You never know who may be in hearing range.”

You go girl. But how about having someone telling you to stick it in your ear or grabbing the phone and stomping on it or maybe shouting something to who you are calling or asking you to “please stay a little longer honey, I need you. Let's have one final drink?”

Keep your cool.

“Don't display anger during a public call. Conversations that are likely to be emotional should be held where they will not embarrass or intrude on others.”

Jackie, babe, you are so smart but why not tell 'em to stay away from anyone while talking on the cell. That's being polite. That's using common sense. That's why phoning, texting or whatever should be done in private, even ever possible, not just in July.

Okay pholks, I'll quit. Got a cell phone call from my wife and I need to got outside to tell her I miss her too and I'll call her right after work.

Enjoy the Fourth. Be safe and, most of all, sane.